Nights and Weekends (posted to Facebook on 5/5/08)

my phone is silent.
it's been that way for days.
and yet, i keep blankly
staring at it,

as if looking so
intently at it
would make it
sing your name.

it would be the
only singing thing.

i toss and turn,
well past the time
to start sleeping.

fearing for the future,
the one you assured me
would stream through my window
and wake me each morning.

i believed in those rays,
even when the sky was overcast.

i once had a vision of
a sun peeking through,
a hand locked in mine,
a kiss sealing a fate.

i have dark nightmares now:
you've gathered it all,
picked up the dice,
gambled with me;

sweet nothings are the ante,
past fiends sit at the table betting.

cold sweat arouses me;
i awake to silence.
no light from the window,
no light from the phone.

with every silence,
doubt leaves a voicemail.