Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Section 8 Blues

only writers live on this block.

they've been kicked out of glass houses and castles in the sky,
those privileged palaces where their only neighbors are peace and quiet.

laid off, fired, sent packing, 86'd,
eviction leads them to Hell's Kitchen
or perhaps its bookstore,
with thousands of self help texts
but no cure for their common diagnosis.

so they sulk on their stoops,
watching the new move-ins struggle
with their circumstance,
wishing their own homes could be comfortably cluttered
instead of neat, feng-shui'd, swept clean,
waiting for the word to become art
and dwell where it used to--
the fragments that hang around now
are too harsh to have over for dinner.

they wonder if inspiration can be FedEx'd to their location,
but there are no special deliveries;
the mailbox stands empty.

such is the toxicity of their city.

*Author's note: this is subject to appreciated.*


i'm starting to learn that even distractions have their place in the world...and, contrary to popular belief, they're not always on the wrong side of the good vs. evil dichotomy.

i don't really feel like elaborating.  i think you'll find out why on your own someday, if you haven't already.


Friday, August 13, 2010

In All My Searching

(Now Playing: "Your Love is Extravagant" -- Casting Crowns)

In all my searching...

I have found perfectly inexplicable Love.  It permeates every part of me, every piece of life itself.

I have found the ultimate Muse, whose very Presence is inspiration.  One thought causes ten thousand songs, all perfect because they bear His Name.

I have found the blessed Hope of a place better than this, where He can embrace me for eternities on end.

I have found everything I've ever wanted, and things I never knew I needed.

In all my searching...I have found a Savior.

Monday, August 9, 2010

The Smoking Section

This was originally an old email I sent to the Christian fellowship I'm in on campus.  It was a Friday night, and we'd just had our weekly fellowship together.  One of the staff members and I had gone to the campus pub a little later to pass out flyers for an event we were having.

So I came back from the Battle of the Bands at Cambridge Queen's Head a little while ago.  Tina invited me to go there with her after an awesome and totally impromptu dorm storming session in Thayer to tell people about the outreach event next Friday.  While we were at the pub, we talked a little bit about how the people there (and there were A LOT of people there) should be individuals that we try to reach out to.
I've always felt like we (Christians in general) do a lot of talking about grassroots outreach...but tonight, we actually did some.
We had a whole lot of flyers with us, and we just went around and passed them out to people at the Battle of the Bands.  It was kind of awkward at first--imagine, tapping random strangers, who may or may not be somewhat inebriated, on the shoulder and giving them flyers about your Christian fellowship's outreach event--but eventually it didn't feel as weird.  For the most part, people seemed genuinely interested.  Some even asked me what the event was all about.  I did see one paper airplane on the floor on the way out...but thankfully that response seemed to be the exception, not the rule.
I guess what I'm trying to get at is...we can have these wonderful talks about evangelism all semester long...but when are we actually going to give out our flyers instead of collecting them in our rooms?  I'll be totally real with you guys, I DEFINITELY wouldn't have gone dorm storming or pub-pubbing (haha) by myself, but after being with everyone tonight, one thing sort of led to another in this crazy, spontaneous chain reaction of sorts.  Neil Cole said in his book Organic Church, "If you want to win this world to Christ, you are going to have to sit in thesmoking section."  We shouldn't be afraid to do that; I mean, it's the Great Commission in plain sight.  Of course actually GOING to the smoking (or drinking) sections of life and talking about Jesus to total strangers is really hard to do (reading over that just now was a little bit scary), but it's definitely something to think about.   
I prayed tonight that what was said in large group would actually leave theroom with us...and this is how God answered.  It might be worth it to actively explore all of what was said tonight further.  

Sunday, August 8, 2010


my thoughts
are playing
on the track
that is my mind
one over
the other
in rapid
they run around in
circles screaming
i'm dizzy with their
frolicking fervor
losing focus
on the hereandnow
faster and faster
their laughter spells
for any peace
i thought
could permeate
my person
while they're
at recess
i'm trying to
get bedrest
i need
a timeout
from all of this

of Carpenters and Kings

i sat nervously
at my station
watching the others work
we had been told
to build our best
in preparation for
the Master's coming

others had constructed crowns
and sculpted stately thrones
were still working
to make them perfect

i had finished long before
my piece was small
nothing special
a basin
its wood not known for beauty
i had barely been able
to mend the crack it bore
i wondered doubtfully
about its worth

at last the Master Carpenter came
all tools ceased their movement
in the hands of the students
from where i sat
i could
see the others
their countenances confident
praise for their pieces imminent

but the Master beheld
their crowns
their scepters
their thrones
in silence
walked past them
without a word

and my heart sank
because i knew
that mine was the least of these

but when the Master
reached my station
he held out his weathered hands
and accepted my piece
when i offered it to him

as i watched
his fingers
caressed the crack
in the basin
and his face broke
into a quiet smile

he inquired
about the purpose
intended for the piece
i replied
that it was made
only to wash feet

the Master Carpenter nodded
turning the basin over
in his hands once more
placing it back on my station

before he turned away
he looked deep into my eyes
smiled and whispered

Well Done

Jericho Road

i had nothing to lose
no standing with
the ones who passed him by
there were no promises
writ for me in the
ancient scrolls
whose words they ritualized

but what of the man
beaten and discarded
by the dusty road?

blood disguised his features
yet i knew he was of Jerusalem.

i saw men of God's temple there
treat him like a dying dog
disowning their
brother in the faith their
peculiar purity at stake

but i had nothing to lose
a Samaritan low as a slave
so i walked where
the priest and the Levite would not
stretched out my hand
to help him as a friend
i had supplies for his wounds
an animal for him to ride
and money for a quiet inn nearby

and as i left him
in the innkeeper's care
i marveled at the day's events:

i had nothing to lose
but i gained something great

Saturday, August 7, 2010

say my name

if you've ever wondered about the title of my blog, gather 'round and i'll tell you a story.

i think Eni first came about when i was in middle school.  at that time, i was writing "stories," "poems," and "songs" fairly frequently.  i put those in quotation marks because in retrospect i'm not sure if the organized chaos i scribbled down back then could pass for any of those things.  in any case, i enjoyed writing; "author" was pretty high up on my possible career list.  because of this, i thought it would be cool to come up with a pseudonym.

the search was on for the perfect pen name.  i don't remember how long the brainstorming process took, or what some of the names that didn't make it were.  all i know is one day the lightbulb came on.  i recalled reading some stories by Avi throughout school (for example, "What Do Fish Have to Do with Anything," which i only remember because of the catchy title).  i always thought his name was kind of neat.  yes, it only had three letters, but something made "Avi" much more aesthetically appealing to me than O'Henry or Mark Twain ever were. 

the more i thought about it, the more a three-letter pseudonym started to sound like a great idea for me too.  that probably makes me somewhat of a copycat, but i'll be honest...almost all of my "creative" ideas back in the day were "inspired" by something else that already existed.  anyway, once i realized that my initials made a pronounceable name, Eni was born.

Eni's about 9 years old now, which makes me feel pretty ancient.  i've recently updated the name to 3Ni to reflect my semi-fascination with leet (no, i wasn't thinking of Ke$ha at the time), but i've never messed with the general idea.  Eni/3Ni has not and will never refer to some alter-ego, nor will it ever officially replace my real name (although according to my birth certificate i did spend the first 4 years of my life with a slightly different first name than i have now...).  it's nothing more than a pseudonym...nothing less than all of me. 

thanks for listening.

with love,

~* 3Ni *~

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

3Ni arrives...[Radio (Declaration)]

I'm a poet by nature, but I also write songs periodically.  Every time I write a song, I wish I could put the lyrics to music instead of having them silent on the page (I do have a dream of dropping an album, after all)...

This summer I FINALLY got to fool around with the lyrics to one of those songs.  And this is the result.

Radio (Declaration) (if the link doesn't work, someone let me know).

~A little disclaimer: I'm not a pro.  I did all the instrumentals, vocals, and effects on my computer, using free (or free-ish) software.  So the quality isn't amazing.~

Please let me know if you like it, or if you hate it, or if you're indifferent.  I like to hear (read: see) what you all think.  I know you read what I write (I just installed the Stats thing on the dashboard, so I can tell*).  But I never know what you guys and gals are thinking about.

At any rate, these are baby steps.  Just know that if you ever go on iTunes and see something by 3Ni (or Eni), chances are it's yours truly.  Unless someone steals my name. :-P

*by the way, I'd like to send a HUGE shout-out and thank you to my followers (the faithful few), and people who read/have read my blog in other countries.  y'all are amazing. :)